No Biting
by gidgetgirl
Summary: Buffy and Spike’s four year old twins discuss the virtues of having a boyfriend, much to Spike’s dismay. A Little Poet, Little Vamp Story. COMPLETE!


DISCLAIMER: Joss owns the canon. I own Emma and Zoe.

AUTHOR'S NOTE: Yet another Little Poet, Little Vamp story.

SUMMARY: Buffy and Spike's four year old twins discuss the virtues of having a boyfriend, much to Spike's dismay.

NO BITING

"What do you think they're talking about?" Spike asked softly, threading his hand through Buffy's.

Buffy followed Spike's gaze across the room. There, sitting together in a single rocking chair, were two little girls with gently curling blonde hair. From their dark lashes to their little pink lips, the two were identical, and had she not personally known for a fact that Emma-Zoe whispering meant trouble, she would have thought they made a very sweet picture, completely absorbed in the conversation they were having.

"Nuh-uh," Zoe, by far the louder of the twins said emphatically. "No way."

Emma just smiled solemnly at her twin and nodded, sure of herself.

"But, Emmy, what if you accidentally swallow their tongue?" Zoe asked, her whispering giving way to bellowing.

"Swallow their tongue?" Spike repeated. "What in the bloody…er… what sort of mischief are they up to?"

Crossing the room, Spike knelt down next to the rocking chair. "Hello, Twinbits," he said, tousling their hair.

"Hello, Daddy!" Zoe yelled, despite the fact that he was less than a foot away from her.

"I see you," Emma said softly, reaching up one small hand to touch him. "Always, Daddy." Deep down, Em was a poet and a Daddy's girl.

"Tell Emma that biting your boyfriend is better than kissing him," Zoe instructed her father.

For once, Spike was taken completely off balance. "Boyfriend?" he asked. His little ones were four, not fourteen, and besides, they weren't going to date until they were thirty.

"Biting?" Buffy asked, trying to keep the bemused tone out of her voice.

"Boyfriends?!" Spike repeated, his voice barely more than a squeak.

"Emma has a boyfriend named Danny," Zoe informed Spike. "I have twelve boyfriends, but I forgot their names, and I may have to eat one of them."

"Danny, huh?" Buffy asked.

Emma nodded, a little coy smile on her face.

"TWELVE?!" Spike couldn't help matching the volume in his daughter's voice. "And what do you mean you may have to eat one of them?"

Zoe shrugged, as if that little detail was completely unimportant. "You know, I may have to eat him and stuff."

"And stuff," Buffy repeated. "I don't trust this stuff-age you speak of, and Zoe, we don't eat people, remember?"

"But he's not a people," Zoe said reasonably. "He's my boyfriend."

"Everyone's a people," Emma said softly. "If you look hard enough and long enough, you can find the person in anyone."

"Even boyfriends?" Zoe asked skeptically.

Emma nodded.

"BLOODY HELL!" Spike couldn't hold it back any longer. "You two do not have boyfriends!"

"Then who did Emma kiss on the playground yesterday?" Zoe asked. "And who am I biting next week?"

"No biting," Buffy said immediately. Four year old Zoe, who was, unlike her slayer sister, completely human, had an odd fascination for vampires. Working backwards, Buffy turned to Emma. "You kissed a little boy?" she asked.

Emma nodded. "Two souls," she said softly. "One kiss."

"There will be no souling," Spike said immediately. "No kissing whatsoever. And no boys."

"His name is Danny," Zoe said. "I told Em she should bite him to see what he tastes like, but she doesn't think he'd like that very much." Zoe paused thoughtfully. "Maybe she can lick him instead."

"THERE WILL BE NO LICKING!" Poor Spike was on the verge of hysterics.

Buffy gathered the little ones in her arms. "How about you two save having a boyfriend until you're a little older?"

Emma snuggled up to Buffy. "I'm older than I was yesterday," she said softly. Leave it to Em, Buffy thought, to turn all philosophical on her in the midst of a kissing-licking-biting conversation.

"Mommy?" Zoe said after a minute.

"Yes, baby?"

"I still think biting is better than kissing." From the stubborn look on her little face, Buffy could tell that Zoe was not about to be dissuaded. "After all, Daddy yells real loud when you bite him."

Fin

What do you guys think? Would you like to see more of Zoe and Emma? The interest dropped off a bit for the last fic, but this one wanted to be written. Let me know what you think.

PLEASE REVIEW!


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